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Building Social Skills

Social skills enable individuals to communicate and interact with others effectively, both verbally and non-verbally, and is important for forming and maintaining relationships. They can also help your loved one navigate social situations in their school, workplace, and the wider community. You can play an important role in guiding your loved one on how to develop appropriate social skills.

  Key Points

  • Social skills refer to the ability to effectively communicate and interact with others.
  • Building social skills helps your loved one cultivate meaningful social interactions and relationships as well as have a greater sense of belonging and self-esteem.
  • Self-advocacy, the ability to communicate one’s interests, needs and rights effectively, is important. It helps your loved ones build the confidence to express themselves in school, workplace, or community settings.

Social skills involve communicating and interacting with others effectively verbally or non-verbally, such as through gestures and body language. The following are useful social skills:

  • Expressing emotions appropriately
  • Communicating ideas
  • Behaving appropriately
  • Recognising social cues
  • Responding to others’ emotions
  • Resolving conflicts1

In social interactions, self-advocacy skills are also important for your loved one to communicate their needs, concerns, and interests to others. The ability to express themselves and engage in more meaningful social interactions and develop friendships may lower the likelihood of falling into depression or anxiety2. By building healthy relationships and having a strong social support network, your loved one will be better supported to navigate through life3.

Such skills can be taught from a young age to cultivate independence. This may also give them the confidence to and speak up in challenging situations, such as when they experience bullying or discrimination.

Having effective social skills aids in the outcome of communication, relationships, building a sense of belonging and self-esteem4, as well as employment.

 Resources

Watch this Video to Learn Self-Advocacy Skills and Strategies Teach Your Loved One These Social Skills Tap On This School Community Tool Kit for Loved Ones with Autism

Footnotes

1https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/conflict-resolution-skills.htm

2https://srcd.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cdev.12905

3This information was gathered from an interview with sector professionals in 2019.

4https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/019188699090188W

  Key Points

  • Your loved one may face challenges developing social skills due to their disability or lack of interaction with others.
  • It is important to create opportunities for your loved one to participate in social activities.

Your loved one may have difficulties acquiring social skills due to their disability, or because they have fewer opportunities to do so. They may also need help in communicating with others. Here are some ways you can support them:

Building social skills and communication

Disability

Potential Challenges

Tips on how you can support your loved one:

Physical Disability
  • Difficulty in controlling facial or jaw muscles which affects speech5
  • Infrequent social participation due to mobility challenges and physical fatigue
  • Explore different modes of communication aids, including Augmentative and Alternative Communication (AAC) and communication tools. 
  • Practise specific skills with them such as how to participate in group interactions appropriately.
  • Equip your loved one to share with others on how best to communicate with them (e.g., using AAC, or speaking to them at eye level if they use a wheelchair).

Deafness/ Hard-of-Hearing
  • Difficulty detecting subtle aspects of others’ speech, such as tone and inflection.
  • Being unaware of the volume they are speaking at.
  • Practise with your loved one how to respond to sensitive questions or comments (e.g., about the use of hearing aids)6.
  • Teach your loved one appropriate ways to get others’ attention (e.g., places to tap someone and the amount of strength they should use).
  • Help your loved one learn and practise the right volume they should speak in and to be aware of instances when they are speaking loudly.
  • Equip your loved one to share with others how they can best communicate with them (e.g., providing important information in writing).

Visual Impairment
  • Inability to observe, learn and respond to non-verbal communication such as body language and facial expressions7.
  • Describe the events that occur in social settings to your loved one.
  • Empower your loved one to seek clarifications during conversations with others where they do not understand what is said.
  • Equip your loved one to share with others how best to communicate with them (e.g., providing detailed descriptions of the situation or environment).

Intellectual Disability
  • Difficulty in understanding social contexts, cues, and language use.
  • Challenges in recognising others’ emotions and perceptions.
  • Displaying behaviour that may not be socially acceptable, such as aggression8 and impulsivity.
  • Provide clear, simple, and short instructions on social norms and acceptable behaviours such as taking turns or maintaining personal space.
  • Role-play different social situations with your loved one and give them feedback on their behaviours.
  • Consider using video modelling to aid explanations. These videos show how others behave in specific social situations.
  • If they are unable to do so on their own, share with others the best way to communicate with your loved one (e.g., using clear, simple language and not speaking too fast).

Autism

  • Challenges in understanding and processing social cues or responding to interactions in the same way as others commonly do.
  • Difficulties in interpreting others’ intentions and responding appropriately to the person or situation9.
  • Use social stories or videos which illustrate social situations to teach your loved one how to behave in these situations.
  • Learn how to read tones, facial expressions, body cues and their corresponding feelings10.
  • If they are unable to do so on their own, share with others the best way to communicate with your loved one (e.g., using more visual supports and less non-verbal cues, and being direct).


Providing your loved one with opportunities to build social skills

  1. Proactively create opportunities for social interactions

    Be intentional in creating opportunities for your loved one to practice social skills. You can encourage them to participate in support or interest groups, and join gatherings or outings. You can also get them to check out these inclusive workshops and events which upskill and enrich persons with disabilities.

  2. Be mindful not to over-protect your loved one

    While you may worry about your loved one’s ability to take part in certain social activities, completely preventing them from participating in those activities may deprive them of opportunities to interact with others. You can seek professional advice on how to strike a balance between watching out for your loved one’s safety and helping them to socialize.

 Resources


Sign up for the Social Skills Group Parent Workshop Equip You and Your Loved One with Social Thinking Concepts (Module1)Equip You and Your Loved One with Social Thinking Concepts (Module2)

Footnotes:

5https://www.bila.ca/2019/02/how-does-cerebral-palsy-affect-social-development/

6https://www.oticon.global/hearing-aid-users/hearing-loss/children-with-hearing-loss/environment-and-social-life

7https://www.mentalhelp.net/intellectual-disabilities/behavioral-and-psychological-features/#:~:text=Some%20people%20respond%20in%20an,lead%20to%20self%2Dinjurious%20behavior

8https://www.mentalhelp.net/intellectual-disabilities/behavioral-and-psychological-features/#:~:text=Some%20people%20respond%20in%20an,lead%20to%20self%2Dinjurious%20behavior

9https://iancommunity.org/cs/what_do_we_know/social_skills_interventions

10https://raisingchildren.net.au/autism/communicating-relationships/connecting/social-skills-for-children-with-asd

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